Top Nine Reasons to Love the NFL Draft

I was given a great topic to blog about this week. The NFL Draft. The most drawn out, over hyped event in sports. But I'm sick of being negative all the time. Into every blog a little light must shine every once in a while. Plus, sports fans think they come off more knowledgeable by bashing everyone and everything in sports. Sometimes I even get suckered into that way of thinking. Actually, I always get suckered into that way of thinking.

You deserve better from me, so that's what I am going to deliver.

What follows is my Top Nine Reasons to Love the NFL Draft *(Please read the disclaimer at the bottom afterwards).

9. Obviously Mel Kiper's hair. No punch line needed.

8. It's a great opportunity to play drinking games. Like taking a drink every time Kiper says "impact player". Before the first round is over you end up drunker than Tony LaRussa at a red light.

7. You get to make fun of Mr. Irrelevant (the last pick in the draft). It must really suck to be him. He probably won't make his team and he'll be stuck on the practice squad all year. So he'll only make $5,000 a week while practicing football with NFL stars. Haha, what a loser.....wait...

6. If you were watching the draft that means you weren't at the Pirate game and didn't see Matt Morris give up 6 runs in 1.2 innings. Random, I know, but still a good reason.

5. Watching the Draft is a great excuse to keep you from having to cut the grass, go shopping, walk the dog, pay the bills, clean your house, take a shower, paint the deck, wash your car, do the dishes, cure cancer, do laundry, watch an NHL playoff game, balance your checkbook, etc.

4. You get to see athletes who are younger than you and dumb as dirt become millionaires right in front of your eyes. Who cares if Vince Young thinks 7+7=banana. All that matters is that he can throw touchdowns...at least, they keep telling us he can.

3. The Browns had to wait four rounds to make their first pick. Good. Everyone hates the Browns. Even people from Cleveland.

2. The Steelers draft better baseball players than the Pirates do. In the 5th round they took Oregon QB Dennis Dixon. Dixon also played minor league baseball in the Braves system in 2007.

And the top reason to love the NFL Draft...

1. It's football in April. Real football, not that futbol junk. Who cares about Ronaldo.


*Actually I hate the draft. I don't want to watch football in April. I want to watch the NBA playoffs and MLB games and the Family Guy and Seinfeld reruns. It is possible to have too much of a good thing...except whoppers, I could eat them all day.