Vixen Violet Banana Slugs

Emerson College. How would one describe such a school? During any given tour, an over enthusiastic guide would probably tell you that Emerson College is bringing innovation to communication and the arts (catchy slogan isn't it?). Located in the heart of Boston, Emerson College hosts an acceptable 2800 students and is mostly known for its top notch TV and Radio stations and its impressive theatre program.

But anyone can figure that out. What they don't tell you before you eagerly say "yes!" to Emerson's acceptance letter and give your soul (or more money then you'll probably make in your lifetime, that creative writing major is looking silly right about now isn't it?) is that, Emerson is, well, male challenged. That 60/40 ratio may not seem too bad, until you realize that about half the men at Emerson aren't swinging your way and the other half have the same hair cut as you, more stylish skinner skinny jeans, and that perfect shade of black eye liner that if it wasn't creepy, you'd probably ask them where they purchased it.

Despite all of this, Emerson has sports teams. Most people's responses when I tell them that, yes despite our artsy appearance, we do host a handful of women and men's D III athletic teams, is usually "huh?" or "hahaha" or "bet you suck."

And you know what? Laugh all you want, question it all you want, but don't say we suck, because oddly enough, the Emerson Lion's are a force to be reckoned with. When my fellow sportscaster, Johnny better known as Juice (don't ask where the nickname comes from, it leads to roughly a 30 minute explanation on a good day), came up to me and asked if he could do a live shot from the gym, my first question was, "Why?" After a few seconds of looking dumbfounded, he replied, "Because the Men's Basketball Team is in finals." To which I replied, "Wait, we're...good?"
Apparently so.

So it turns out the Lion's Den is a place that other teams fear (get it, Lions Den?!) and that our little school holds its own in the worst division of college sports, but a division nonetheless. Despite our impressive sports record (for our school at least) our mascot has always baffled me. The Emerson Lions? Really? We aren't the most ferocious bunch and I'm fairly sure that in terms of a caste system, we are the peons, and on the food chain, we are plankton. Having a lion as a mascot, seems to be a bit of a cruel joke, because really, who are we kidding? It doesn't even have cool alliteration, and if it had that, I may have let the issue slide.

This got me thinking about mascots and I decided that I wanted to find more weird school mascots and see how they compare to the ill fitted lion that my school sports. Here are my top ten strangest college school mascots ever.

10. Oregon Tech Hustlin' Owls- Can owls actually hustle? I wasn't aware of that owls were such pimps.

9. Virgina Wahoos- Wow, and I thought a lion was a cruel mascot for an art school.

8. New York University Violets- Isn't NYU one of the best schools in the nation? Do you really need your mascot to be a violet to remind yourself that your school color is purple?

7. Sweet Briar Vixens- Those girls better all be 10's because a mascot like Vixen is hard to live up to.

6. South Carolina Gamecocks- I don't have to explain why this is funny.

5. Trinity Christian Trolls- That's just not nice. Trolls? Come on.

4. North Carolina School of the Arts Fighting Pickles- Fighting Pickles? What does that even mean? Are pickles truly that aggressive? Where are my pacifist Pickles out there?

3. Jamestown Jimmies- Up here in New England, jimmies are what you put on ice cream not what you name a school mascot.

2. Tulane Green Wave- Don't they know that water is blue? Silly Tualane.

1. Santa Cruz Banana Slugs- I'm not sure what that means but I know that it makes me want to vomit. Are there slugs that look like bananas? Or are they banana colored slugs? The world may never know.

So there you have it, the ten weirdest college mascots hand selected by yours truly with the help of www.listology.com After reading their entire list of 50 or so crazy college mascots, Emerson's choice for a lion is looking like a better and better decision by the minute.

Go Lions!